“Meyy, come back…Meyy”
“You won’t understand mom; just don’t call me again”
“Meyy….”
Mey is sitting on a half-broken car. This is one of her favourite places in this town. The car is there till the day she was a dot. Her mother used to take her there every day after the dawn. The car is now more aged and broken. But it is still giving shelter to the hopeless trees and insects. In spring, it’s more like a bouquet humming with exotic flowers and bees. Mey comes here when she is happy or sad; sometimes! The beautiful river just some step forward made the place more wholesome. She calls it “purple”.
In rain, this ancient pal of Mey looks like a fresh green valley. Tangled leaves come out from its window. Mey touches them. They are so smooth; gracious. Once she found a lavender seedling there. My goodness! You won’t believe how much happy she was. She took care of that plant as a child. Then, one morning she couldn’t find the plant. Someone took it. It might be the juveniles who used to tease her. Mey cried. She cried the whole night because her tiny lavender left her without blooming. How could she forget me? Mey cried again.
Mey can’t cry over trivial things now. She is not a dot anymore. She is a big girl having big responsibilities and goals to accomplish. She is not allowed to be sad about tiny stuffs now. She is a big girl.
Mey is sitting on a half-broken car. Not talking to her pal or telling her weird stories, today she is looking at the dark blue sky. The faded sea-green colour of the car looking deeper inside Mey’s eyeballs. Her teardrops are wetting her hand and part of her shirt. The biggie dark clouds are veiling the sky and Mey is looking at them with her vague eyes.
“Meyy,
where are you?” (A sound whispers)
“Why you came here, mom? I told you just let me be alone.”
(looking behind)
Mey saw none there except herself. “Was it my illusion?” She asked herself.
“Meyy,
where are you?” (Again, the sound)
Mey looked everywhere. There is none in that piece of land except herself and her ancient pal.
“Meyy…see I found you.”
“Nooo, mamma. Okay catch me now (Mey chuckles)”
“Meyy…
stop I can’t run more (Mrs. Wilson smiles)”
Mey couldn’t believe her eyes. She is looking at her 6 years old self who dreamt to be a firefly someday. “Am I dreaming on this fine summer day?” She asked herself. If yes, she just wants the dream to continue. Her blinking eyes are looking at Mrs. Wilson and smol Mey playing hide and seek.
“Mamma, see it’s a car”
“Yes, it’s here when I was young. Nobody knows who left it here”
“See mamma. It’s pretty. Can’t we take it to our home? We’ll take care of her.”
” No, Meyy it’s broken. Let it be here.
Let’s go home”
“Mey touches her pal for the first time with her smol fingers”
Big Mey knows all of it. She can recall every part of her childhood. She had the best childhood anyone can have. She still can smell the fragrance of the air. She even remembers the promises she gave to herself and her mom.
“Mamma I’ll buy you a car like this one, I promise.
I’ll buy a big lavender garden for you too.”
Mrs. Wilson smiles.
“Don’t smile mamma, I’m a big girl now”
Mrs. Wilson smiles again.
“mamma”
They left.
They left the gloomy piece of land leaving Mey alone with her pal and her insecure self. Mey’s eyes are getting relief watching them leaving and thinking how much her tiny self, used to be happy.
She didn’t realise when her tears wet her shirt. She didn’t realise when the messy air messed up all her curly hair and her life. She didn’t realise when she has grown up so much that her mamma becomes mom who cannot understand why her little Mey cries under her pillow every night. She couldn’t understand when her ancient pal becomes unable to console her either. She couldn’t realise when her long old dreams become nothing but a burden and her childhood wishes only become responsibilities for her. She wonders when she has grown this much toxicity within her head.
Mey looked at her pal. She is giving shelter to so many weak existences for years being so happy. Spreading happiness. She never complained. She listened to May’s weird stories too; so patiently.
Mey laughed thinking that.
Mey is looking at the sky. It’s getting clear. Seems the big chunk of clouds is fading away taking the burden Mey was growing in her heart with them. Fluffy light clouds are taking place of the dark ones.
Mey is looking at “Purple”. Her smooth waves are blessing Mey’s eyes. Her heart is feeling calm and light like those fluffy clouds smiling in the sky. Mey realised that she was so much drowned with the dead fireflies that she never appreciated the living hundreds of them just around her; lightening her world with their best.
A cherry leaf falls on May’s hair. She took it in her hand. It’s beautiful. She felt happy because she is alive. She felt blessed even with her imperfect self.
Mey switched on her phone. 37 missed calls are visible on the screen. Mey knows she has to talk to her mom. She felt she didn’t talk to her for ages. And it’s true. She remembered each and every time she was rude to her mom. She felt grave.
“Are you hearing me Meyy? I’m worried. Are you okay?” Mrs Wilson said.
Mey didn’t realise when she called her mom. What to tell her? Her heart is screaming to say so many things she didn’t tell her mom over years.
“Meyy? Are you okay?”
“Inhale-exhale”
“I love you, mamma. I love you more than anyone in this world”
(That’s all her tongue could say)
